Thursday, July 9, 2009

Happy to be Home!

So it will be almost a week on Sunday without a maid and today marked a week with me taking over all my household chores. Even though the maid-from-hell left for India on Sunday, she went on strike on Thurs, which basically means she refused to do any work from that day on. Fine, I said and plunged headlong in to all things domestic. I mentioned earlier, we have had a crazy week but hey, I survived to tell the tale.

My mother who has domestic assistants galore back in India to manage her house, has been feeling very sorry for me. I understand her concern, but now I am a wee bit irritated. It's not like I am the only woman in the world having to manage my house alone! Far from it infact. I call her every morning and if I can't, she will call me instead and so we talk everyday,mother and I. We are best friends too. Which means I tell her everything. But that also means I am foolish because there are some things moms needn't know! Else they go crazy on you. In my case, mother decides to throw a pity party on my behalf. So she will rant and moan about how much her baby is having to handle. It is annoying. It is discouraging and above all tiring. I have told her that it is my house, my husband and my baby and errr, my garden too. So it is a pleasure looking after all of these. No issues.

Seven years ago when me and hubster met, we decided that once we got married, I would stay home and more so after a baby. We were both very sure and comfortable with the whole idea. We had already decided that we would downsize our lifestyle but would essentially live on his income. I would look after our house and he would go hunting and gathering. I was infact very grateful that he didn't assign me extra worth only upon getting a job outside or working on a career. He was delighted that I chose to stay home and serve our home and us. We as a husband and wife team, consider it an invaluable investement towards making a comfortable and a harmonious home life.

It gives me a deep satisfaction when he wakes up in the morning and looks forward to starting his day with clean and ironed clothes. He realises the value of freshly brewed coffee followed by a hearty Indian breakfast. He still thanks me everyday, even after so many years being together. And my heart sings! I love to make him happy, it is so easy! I have such a sense of accomplishment when a day's work is done as I look around. The house is sparkling, the bathrooms squeaky clean, beds made, Yohaan's food pureed for the day, hubster's lunch packed, laundry folded and as evening falls heavenly smells from my kitchen remind me that hubster must be on his way home. I love to cook. It is a stress buster for me and no matter how tired I might be, I make it a point to cook something nice for ourseleves because dinner is the only meal we have together. Although I am a control freak, with Yohaan's arrival I have learnt to let go a lot. So yes we dont follow a strict schedule for the day, we have plenty of fluidity to our routine. That means if the guest bathroom is not cleaned by mid noon so be it. If the plants have not been watered for the day, never mind. If Yohaan has not had his quota of fruits, no problem, I will give him an extra feed from me, which is better anyways. The point is we have fun. We are a team and above all as my blog title suggests, we are happy to be home!

I read so many blogs by women who talk endlessly about the virtues of being a stay home mom or a working one. Personally, it has never been an issue with me. I am higly educated with a profesional degree. Prior to getting married and two years in to marriage, I worked for some of the best known companies in the world. I have travelled a lot , I am well read and I have made my own money, plenty of it. It is a different matter that I blew away my money anyhow, now I am at a stage in life about which I used to dream as a young girl. I have all that I wanted. A loving husband, a baby and a lovely home. Education and a job and travelling and living wild happened rather in an unplanned manner. It just happened to me. But all along I knew where I wanted to be and I am there!

Frankly I dont even understand why would anyone find it a point of contention-this stay home vs working woman thingy. Isn't it more about the freedom to choose? As women dont we get to choose? Although in my case, it helps that I am a christian so taking certain decisions becomes a lot more easier. I dont have the usual worldly pressures to conform, to seek after a career, wealth,prosperity and status. The Bible encourages us women to seek our fullfilment and identity as home makers and child rearers. I have no agenda. I have no urgent goals to achieve while working for outsiders and I am my own master. I decide when I get up for the day, what I wear, when I take a break or even take the whole day off!! For me it's a no brainer. And I do realise that it must be so for many women on the other side of the fence. I am sure they would find my existence mundane to the point of death-by-boredom. Well anyways, I would rather die peacefuly on my couch rather than the office cubicle! All I am saying is that I am happy with my choices which is what is true liberation and peace. I am indeed very happy-to-be-home!

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